There once was a man, brave and kind was he,
His head was in the clouds while the world was at his feet,
There once was a girl, strong and sweet and tough
They didn’t have much money, but what they had was enough
They went along to the car boot sale, to see what they could buy
And through the crap and clutter, something caught their eye
Excited crowds got in their way but a shining star did glow
A stall with toys for children was the only place to go!
They parted ways with the fiver, when they bought some baby shoes
Then a man called Bill came along, with a ten pound note to use
He said ‘got change for a tenner?’ and got more than he bargained for
When a fiver that we know and love, changes hands once more
He slid it in his pocket pressed up against his cheek
All lonely and forgotten, it remained there for a week
Thrown aside collecting dust, no longer clean
Until one day it ventured inside the washing machine
Oh the places it has been
Oh the things that fiver’s seen
From the car boot sale to the washing machine
That’s a fiver’s destiny
Bill found the note when he was buying a pint and he said ‘It’s my lucky day’
‘Cause he’d only left his wallet at home so was struggling to pay
The barmaid took the note, and said ‘Here’s your pint, Bill’
But the landlord wasn’t looking, so she stole it from the till
She lent it to her gran who spent it on some food
Then it was given as change to a weird old man, who was shopping for some lube,
He took it to a strip club, and in a hazy drunken whirl
It ended up in the G string of a nearly naked girl
Oh the places it has been
Oh the things that fiver’s seen
From the car boot sale to the washing machine
From the trousers of a drunk to the barmaids granny
From an old perv’s wallet to a stripper’s…
That’s a fiver’s destiny
She used it as a vessel to put powder up her nose
But when she heard a knock on the cubicle door, she froze
She flushed the away evidence, which wasn’t very clever
For now our story can’t go on as the Fiver was lost… FOREVER
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